In honor of the weather being hot, humid, and just plain sticky … let’s talk about feeling stuck. Depression is serious and finding solutions specific to you that support your mental health are important. I will say however that it’s not uncommon for people to rush from a temporary stickiness to judging themselves into a full blown depressive mindset. Sometimes it’s hard to know the difference.
Here’s some thoughts on feeling stuck…
- Don’t pelt yourself with negative self-talk … Recognize! It will take a minute to recognize you’ve gotten sticky. One of the best ways to know is when you’re judging yourself constantly to the point of feeling like crap and wanting to do nothing. Why did I get lost in that TV show, I’ve totally just wasted an hour of cleaning time? Why can’t I ever stick to an exercise plan? I’m undisciplined, pathetic, depressed, sick, dying, etc. When negative self-talk is repeating in your head and your body is stuck to the couch for long periods of time … it’s time to recognize you’re stuck.
- Is the obvious what you need? This one seems … well … obvious. If you’re exhausted on a regular basis … maybe you don’t need to buy more supplements and do more research on WebMD to find that illness you MUST have … maybe you need to take an afternoon off work and just allow yourself to sleep. Maybe your mind needed that “wasted” TV time as a meditation. Are you planning enough enjoyable activities? It can be amazing how taking our human need for joy seriously and adding the right dosage of ‘your specific brand of fun’ into your daily diet can release the log jam to get the river flowing.
- Is should’ing getting in the way of trusting? We can should ourselves into thinking we should always have boundless energy, should always feel blessed, happy, content. You name it. But above all, we should never feel stuck. Pleeeaaasssseeee! It’s discomfort that creates the best of life. Feeling sticky is uncomfortable … yes … it’s also necessary. It’s when we start judging feeling stuck that we can prolong the stickiness or even should ourselves right into feeling depressed. When you find yourself stuck … Ask … What is my stickiness here to tell me? Does God/Life/The Universe want me to learn something? Can I sit patiently in the temporary discomfort trusting that something amazing is waiting? Let’s not forget that sweet corn grows best in humidity.
- Energy creates energy. If you’ve recognized you’re stuck, tried the obvious, and are trusting life, KNOW it isn’t the end of the world, it’s just a sticky moment. You can’t create motivation when you waste your energy on negative self-talk. You can start a load of laundry during the next commercial and see if that gets the energy going. If you wasted your Saturday, see if you can do better on Sunday. Remember, feeling stuck can also a great time to finally hire a coach. ?
On a side note, if in the past days, weeks, or month you’ve had any thoughts around suicide, you may be dealing with something heavier than mindset and I can’t encourage you enough to please, please seek further help. Call the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline at 800-273-8255. They are available 24 hours a day, everyday and you can also use their online chat at www.suicidepreventionlifeline.org